Networking is the most effective way to attract new
business. But relatively few people do
it, and most of them aren’t very good at it.
How come? Mostly it
is a mindset problem. People hear
‘networking’ and they immediately go into sales mode. Instead of “listening and learning,” they’re
“telling and selling.”
Think about how we react when someone is trying to “sell”
us. Our first reaction is to tighten up
and go into the “no” mode, lest we get fast-talked into doing something we
don’t really want to. Now think about
how we react when someone is trying to help us.
We open up and get more cooperative.
Isn’t this latter attitude more likely to help you create a relationship
that can lead to sales?
I approach networking situations by suggesting that I would
like to know more about my conversational partner in order to find out if
there’s a way I can be of assistance to them.
(This must be a real offer by the way—people will know instantly if
you’re being insincere.)
Three things happen when you do this:
1) You make a positive impression on them, because you’re
perceptive enough to see how interesting they are.
2) The more they talk, the more (most people) feel that they
have built up a conversational “debt” that requires them to spend some time
listening to you. That puts you into a
“pull” rather than a “push” situation when it becomes your turn.
3) You develop a better understanding of their wants, needs,
and “hot buttons” that will facilitate an eventual sales pitch if one is
appropriate.
There is one additional benefit. When you use “listening and learning,” you
will stand out from the crowd” of bad networkers and become more memorable.
So when you’re in a networking situation, remember Archie
Bunker’s advice and “stifle.” You won’t
regret waiting your turn!
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